Thanks. :) I am a little surprised at how writing this stuff here really does help! I know that I hardly have the worst in laws to deal with, but it also makes me feel better because it really isn't just ME. Some families really do have a hard time accepting people I guess.

As forced as I'll ever feel, I really don't see any chance of me  giving them money. Your Nana... that is a different story entirely. And God bless her! My in laws are not yet in their 60's. Retirement age (early) is 62. Regular retirement is 67. They are both in good health. They each just traded in their 2007 cars for 2009's. They don't even send a card for my kid's birthdays.

Whatever.

Thanks again for your support. I don't know yet what we're going to actually do. But I DO appreciate your support!

This is the most outrageous thing I have ever heard. Ever. Do not give in to this made up idea of a retirement plan. A gift is a gift. You should never have to pay it back. Unbelievable.

Not only did my husband agree to the money, when my FIL didn't have it when he wanted to he started sending us late payment emails along with a monthly payment schedule! Saying DH said he'd give him $75 a month and he hadn't recieved it and the following month is already due and a monthly payment schedule! I am totally opposed to the entire idea but am keeping my mouth shut for bigger battles to come at the moment.

What's amusing is the time we get a phone call from his parents which are divorced are -For money, to discuss what FIL wants help with, MIL will call only when she wants him to do work around the house that her boyfriend won't do for her or complain about me. Don't you love hearing hubby trying to speak quietly or in code so you won't know they are talking about you? Hubby now goes out of the room or in the yard to talk to her lol Hubby tries but I know better. I honestly could care less about what her opinion of me is any longer but it really used to annoy me in the past.  

We are broke at the moment and his family knows this so its infuriating to me that FIL would have the nerve to start sending late payment notices. Perhaps he could think, maybe they really are struggling this month. Nope, he sends late payment emails and cc's them to hubby's sister and is sure to make a notation that she is paid up in full. Yep she is also giving him $75 a month. I was so pissed off when I saw that he did that, how petty can we get here? SIL and BIL are much better off then we are financially at the moment.

Meanwhile my parents just said they'd help me pay off my student loan because we are so behind, thank god! I truly cannot wrap my head around the way his family treats him and it saddens me to see what he thinks is 'normal' when he comes to his family.

that is truly the rudest thing i have ever heard. late payments, ridiculus.
its one thing to say he bought him into the world and all that, but that was his freaking job, he had kids to rbing them up and for them to bring up other kids...not for them to re-pay them.
if he is struggling, maybe he needs to sell a car or house and rent or something. obviously not ur place to say tho, but it is your money that he is asking for and that is your business.