This is an interesting forum in general. I have found that getting my husband to be a couple with me rather then his mother is so key in this fiasco. I detach so well from mother in law until my husband sides with her on something or betrays me for her benefit, for example giving her information about me that I asked him not to just because he does not want to lie to her.

To be honest, I love my husband but if I didn't have children I am not so sure I would be still in this marriage, a mother in law like this is just too stressful and unpleasant, so much better just not to be entwined with someone like this.

Oh, but I was naive, I believed it would be a simple fix. My husband is on my side and willing to go to counselling but it is still and enormous battle, one I would rather not be fighting. I don't understand why my husband does not see that truly the best thing to do for his family is to get away from this monster.

Mama's boys and monster in laws seem to go hand in hand don't they?

Well, keep working on the councelling, and I suspect it will eventually pay off. Yes, I agree that Mama's boys and monster in laws DO seem to go hand in hand.

Hang in there, the hard work to get your hubby to realize how to be a "good" son and a GREAT hubby will pay off, I just know it!  Mine is doing better at it, albiet it is one slow step at a time sometimes.