Tortured Daughters-In-Law

If your husband was forced to choose between remaining married (you are considered by all to be the worlds' greatest wife) and losing you forever in order to be with his mom.....well, ladies which would it be?
Hmmmm...I ponder that sometimes.
Recently, since I last wrote, I had a huge blowout with not only the biatch in law, but her other son as well. So huge I told them that if they stepped foot in this house again I would burn it to the ground. Part of me was kidding.
3 years ago I devoted 4 months of my life to saving my mil's life. She had contracted a huge, deadly infection during surgery and was sent home by her doctor to die. I slept on a tiny cot beside her bed and nursed her back to health, running her household and paying her bills, etc. while her sons did nothing. I felt as though my husbands contribution was being separated from his wife all those months. Now, because I don't want guests in our house while we have half of our house gutted for renovation they have launched a public assault on me calling me vicious names and saying that they had always suspected that I was an evil person, just hiding it from them. I fired back in kind. Now we are at a stand off.
Here is the kicker...ready?...my husband says he supports me to my face, but he can't perform his "marital duties" because of all of this stress.  This is a man who deals with stress everyday in his job and he is too upset about mommy to do it?
Well, that is my story. So, do you think your husband would choose mommy or you?
Wife of the Mamas Boy[/color][/size][/font]

There have been times when my FH has defended his mommy instead of me, but the fact he's willing to move 12,000 miles away to be with me was a good sign that in the end he'd "choose" me.   I really try not to put him in a position of choosing, even when his mother has been utterly evil.  The only thing that really bothers me is when he doesn't validate my feelings.  For example, I don't neccessarily mind if he defends his mother, but I *DO* mind when he cannot really see my side of things.

As time goes along, he is getting better at seeing the many faults of his mommy and he is finally validating my points.  I don't expect him to wage any kind of punishment upon his mother for her acts, just merely to support me in the sense of agreeing that I have valid reasons for how I feel.

I really try not to think about whether DH would choose me or not. I fear that he wouldn't, but that doesn't necessarily mean that is true. While MIL is a gigantic issue with us, it is not our only issue, so I would be afraid to push him into a decision. With him, once he has made his mind, he would be too stubborn to change it, even if he wanted to. I don't think that my current situation will ever change with MIL.

Me. Hands down. Whenever MIL is being especially difficult and hurtful towards him I make sure to tell him how wonderful he is and how proud I am that he is my husband. Plus, I give him sex. I'd like to see that woman TRY to compete with that. HA!

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ditto!!!

LOL, If my mil only knew what I do to make that man happy she would jump off the Bay Bridge, hhhmmm.  
  It would be me hands down, he loves his mom but he also knows he's a grown man.  It took a lot of time and talks for him to see what his mother was doing to me but once he figured it out he stepped up.

My husband always takes my side and always takes up for me *even if I am wrong*. Its really amazing. But, that doesn't stop all the crap, especially since we are both peaceful people.

Me, hands down! My DH and my MIL have never had a very close relationship (which is really hard for me to understand why). I would never make him choose, but I know in my heart he'd pick me. He knows that I am the only one to stand by his side, no matter what, and go to the depths of the Earth for him. It gets really tough for us sometimes with my MIL acting like a drama queen, but we both love each other and can make it through anything!!

You are so lucky your DH can see through your MIL's drama in the end!